Classical Mythology by H. A. Guerber was published in 2016: as its name suggests, Classical Mythology focuses on the mythology of ancient Greece, and explains many of them in vivid detail. Classical Mythology is a fantastic book to read for anyone interested in the myths of Greece, as well as works of imagination and creativity. Also, I will not be discussing all the myths, but I will elaborate on most of them.
The book begins with the definition of mythology: “Mythology is the science which treats of the early traditions, or myths, relating to the religion of the ancients, and includes, besides a full account of the origin of their gods, their theory concerning the beginning of all things” (1). For the Greeks and Romans, there were the Olympian gods (like people of all cultures, the Greeks and Romans believed in their gods for the sake of explaining things which they had trouble understanding - ex. the world): like many other peoples, they believed in a designer when it came to nature, seeing how many of the things around them seemed to be put there just for their use. According to Greek mythology, the world was created when Chaos, a powerful, massive deity, reigned with his wife Night (also named Nyx/Nox). Eventually, they grew tired of having great power but nothing to use their power on: calling their son Erebus (“Darkness”) to help them, “His first act was to dethrone and supplant Chaos; and then, thinking he would be happier with a helpmeet, he married his own mother, Nyx. Of course, with our present views, this marriage was a heinous sin; but the ancients, who at first had no fixed laws, did not consider this union unsuitable, and recounted how Erebus and Nyx ruled over the chaotic world together, until their two beautiful children, Aether (Light) and Herema (Day), acting in concert, dethroned them, and seized the supreme power” (2-3). When that happened, Aether and Hemera had their own child, Eros (also known as “Amor”/”Love”) to help them create the world, including the sea (Pontus) and the earth (Gaea). It was said that in the beginning, Earth was mostly barren. However, Eros quickly remedied this situation by shooting his arrows into the ground, causing life to arise. Guerber writes of the geography of the Earth that the Greeks believed in: “The Earth thus created was supposed by the ancients to be a disk, instead of a sphere as science has proved. The Greeks fancied that their country occupied a central position, and that Mount Olympus, a very high mountain, the mythological abode of their gods, was placed in the exact center. Their Earth was divided into two equal parts by Pontus (the Sea,-equivalent to our Mediterranean and Black Seas); and all around it flowed the great river Oceanus in a ‘steady, equable current,’ undisturbed by storm, from which the Sea and all the rivers were supposed to derive their waters” (5). The Greeks also believed in the Hyperboreans, a race of humans who lived basically in paradise in an area north of them that was always spring: “Their homes were said to be ‘inaccessible by land or by sea.’ They were ‘exempt from disease, old age, and death,’ and were so virtuous that the gods frequently visited them, and even condescended to share their easts and games. A people thus favored could not fail to be happy, and many were the songs in praise of their sunny land” (5). Another fabled people were the Ethiopians, who were said to live with the gods themselves. They were mentioned to live close to the Isles of the Blest, some blessed islands which were reserved for the best of humans: after their deaths, they go to the Isles to live with the gods in eternal bliss (some sources say that to secure entrance to the Isles, you have to live three consecutive virtuous lives in a row: you must be reincarnated repeatedly and succeed likewise).
Uranus, the god of the sky, fell in love with Gaea, the goddess of the earth. They had twelve children, the Titans. Uranus, fearing that they may overthrow him, sent them into Tartarus (Hell). When it comes to the Titans, there are six males (Oceanus, Coeus, Crius, Hyperion, Iapetus, and Cronus) and six females (Ilia, Rhea, Themis, Thetis, Mnemosyne, and Phoebe). Gaea and Uranus had more children, including the Cyclopes (there were three, Brontes - “Thunder,” “Steropes” - “Lightning,” and “Arges” - “Sheet-lightning”) and the Centimani (the hundred-handed ones, who, like the Cyclopes, numbered three - Cottus, Briareus, and Gyes), who Uranus also sent to Tartarus (because he found them ugly). Gaea, irritated that her husband had sentenced their children to banishment, decided to conspire with her children against him, thereby granting them their freedom. The youngest (and trickiest) of the Titans, Cronus, was given a scythe. By using deception (Gaea was stated to have pretended to want to make-up with Cronus), Cronus defeated his father Uranus (by cutting him into small pieces, including the severing of his genitals). Before Uranus was dismembered, he told his son that just like how he was overthrowing him, his own children will overthrow him one day as well. Cronus as a ruler was initially popular, seeing how he freed the inhabitants of Tartarus, but largely ruined his reputation when he allowed his father’s prophecy to determine his action: when his sister, Rhea, gave birth to their child, he sucked it into his stomach to prevent Uranus’s prophecy from coming to pass. This cycle was repeated numerous times (because contraception didn't exist back then, unfortunately). Rhea, however, wouldn’t allow for all her children to be devoured: she hid one, Jupiter (also known as Zeus, who was an infamous womanizer who caused the misery of countless women) from Cronus by giving Cronus a rock covered with blankets to consume (he probably wasn’t thinking too much when he ate it, seeing how he already had quite a few Olympians in his stomach and was probably overconfident in his baby-eating abilities). Rhea had Zeus sent to Mount Ida to be raised. Later, when Zeus matured (at least physically: emotionally he’s still immature and has no control over his primal impulses), he freed his siblings (Neptune, Pluto, Vesta, Ceres, and Juno) by feeding Cronus a drink that caused him to vomit them up. After they defeated the Titans, Jupiter named himself the king of the world, and sent many of the Titans to Tartarus (some sources say that Cronus was allowed to live peacefully on earth, but I find this unlikely, seeing how he deeply wronged Jupiter by devouring his siblings). That is, “Saturn, or Cronus, the leader and instigator of the revolt, weary at last of bloodshed and strife, withdrew to Italy, or Hesperia, where he founded a prosperous kingdom, and reigned in peace for many long years” (13).
Gaea, awakening from her slumber, found her children the Titans largely sent to Tartarus or demoted by the Olympians. Angry, he summoned Typhoeus, a powerful monster, to punish Zeus. The Olympian gods were so terrified that they fled to Egypt, where they are said to have inspired the gods of the Egyptians: “Jupiter became a ram, while Juno, his sister and queen, changed herself into a cow” (14). Jupiter, ashamed at his cowardice, eventually returned and defeated Typhoeus. Gaea created another giant, Enceladus, to fight Zeus, but he was also in turn beaten, and was chained under Mount Aetna (which explained earthquakes). Jupiter divided his realm among him and his two brothers: he would reign over Olympus and the sky, Neptune was granted control over the sea, and Hades possessed dominion over the underground and underworld. Humans were said to have been invented by the titan Prometheus, who was known for his foresight, insight, and intelligence (he fashioned humans from clay). However, he enraged Zeus when he gave the best parts of a sacrificial offering to the humans (he hid the muscles in a jar that was covered with unattractive fat, and placed most of the fat in a jar that was covered with a thin layer of delicious meat). Zeus, feeling resentful that he had been cheated, got his vengeance by forbidding Prometheus to give the gift of fire to humankind. Prometheus, uncaring, gave the fire (from Vesta/Hestia’s hearth) to humans. Zeus punished him yet again by banishing him to the Caucasian Mountains, where “a voracious vulture was summoned to feast upon his liver, the tearing of which from his side by the bird’s cruel beak and talons caused the sufferer intense anguish. All day long the vulture gorged himself; but during the cool night, while the bird slept, Prometheus’ suffering abated, and the liver grew again, thus prolonging the torture, which bade fair to have no end” (18). For all his suffering, humankind came to learn the importance of technology, and thanked him for it: he was eventually freed many centuries later by the hero Hercules. To punish humans for Prometheus’s “misdeed” (please call to mind that Jupiter was an immature, immoral child at heart), Jupiter decided the best course of action was to make their lives a living hell: in the beginning, life was basically perfect. Jupiter decided to ruin the lives of mortals by sending Prometheus’s brother, Epimetheus, a beautiful wife named Pandora (whose name translates to “all-gifted,” seeing how she had everything a person would want in a human) to bear a deadly present to humankind: a jar full of the evils of the world. Pandora was told, along with Epimetheus, to not open the jar (they weren’t informed of its contents). Pandora, who was also curious, opened it anyway, causing the evils of the worlds to cause everyone immense anguish (it was described that these evils appeared like moths and traveled at a rapid speed). It should be noted that this story can be read as a patriarchal one that has misogyny: Pandora, as the first woman, was basically allotted the responsibility for all of humanity’s suffering (again, according to this tale everyone was happy when there were only men). Furthermore, at the end of the story, only hope remained, and served to comfort those who were still grieving (this can be read as an act of sadism by the gods - if people had no hope, they would end their lives, thereby ending all their suffering - the purpose of hope is to keep them alive to suffer still more torments in the future. As Nietzsche put it, hope is the greatest of all evils, for it prolongs the torments and sufferings of humankind). According to the Greeks, there were four ages: the Golden Age (reign of the Titans), the Silver Age (which saw the advent of seasons and the introduction of the concept of work and farming), the Age of Brass (which saw much fighting), and the Iron Age (full of suffering, pain, and atrocities). Jupiter and the other gods decided to annihilate humanity for its evil after seeing the depredations of the Iron Age (conveniently forgetting that they were the ones responsible for humanity’s depravity and evil: they’re completely foolish and stupid). They decided to wipe out humanity by using a deluge/flood to do the job: only Deucalion and Pyrrha, a pious old couple, survived. They were instructed to throw the bones of their mothers behind them to repopulate the world (which they really shouldn’t have done: by repopulating the world, they would allow for the potential for massive suffering, as there’s nothing stopping Zeus and the other gods from causing humanity numerous problems. They correctly interpreted that the “mother” in questioning is Gaea, Mother Earth, and her “bones” are stones. Indeed, when they threw the rocks behind their heads, those tossed by Deucalion became adult males while those thrown by Pyrrha became adult females.
Guerber moves on to discuss Jupiter: he was married to Juno. He cheated on her innumerable times, causing intense suffering to various people. In one instance (that was one of the better ones), he turned himself into a bull to kidnap the beautiful young princess Europea: he took her to Europe, which is named after her. They had three children: Minos, Rhadamanthus, and Sarpedon. Eventually, Minos and Rhadamanthus were made judges of the underworld, and Sarpedon was killed in battle during the Trojan war. Europe’s family, in attempting to find her, was devastated: one of her family members, Telephassa, died of grief. Another, Cadmus, founded Thebes while he was searching for his long-lost sister: he was told by the Delphi oracle to follow a certain cow and to found a city on the land which it rests on. Following the instructions, he found that the place where he was supposed to build his city was close to the home of a dragon of Mars (which ate people). Slaying it, he was told to plant its teeth into the ground. Upon doing so, giants came from the ground and menaced him. He was told by a divine voice to throw a stone into their midst: heeding the instructions, the giants began fighting and started killing each other until there were only five of them left. The remaining five became the servants of Cadmus. Jupiter gave Harmonia, the daughter of Mars and Venus, to Cadmus as a wife. However, his fate on earth wasn’t a happy one: although the sources differ, he was eventually transformed into a snake along with his wife Harmonia. That is, Guerber writes that that occurred because they forgot a sacrifice, while others say that Mars, infuriated by the loss of his dragon, transformed him and his wife into snakes as punishment. For all of Jupiter’s problems, he still had at least a sense of justice when it came to certain individuals: an elderly couple, Philemon and Baucis, were allowed a long, prosperous life in a large temple when they were hospitable to their guests/travelers who needed shelter (the travelers turned out to be Jupiter and Mercury). However, like many other stories, there was a catch: the rest of the town had refused Jupiter and Mercury a place to stay, and they were punished by being put to death (they drowned in a flood). Guerber moves on to discuss Juno, who, unfortunately, married a terrible husband. To get her vengeance for her husband’s affairs, she ruthlessly punished the women he was involved with, frequently transforming them into wild animals. She was still a relatively moral goddess when it came to other topics: she rewarded the sons of a priestess who used themselves to carry her chariot around (due to them not finding the necessary bulls) with eternal happiness in Elysium (which killed them in the process, as Elysium is in the afterlife, but it was painless, seeing that they were asleep when she transported them there). The next goddess to be discussed is Minerva: she burst from the head of Zeus, seeing how Zeus devoured her mother (Metis) in a way akin to how Cronos sucked his children into his bowels in a fit of terror. Minerva was the goddess of strategy and wisdom, which is excellently seen in how she won the patronage of Athens by providing them with an olive bush, which allowed them large revenue: Poseidon’s gift of horses was rejected, seen in how the geography wasn’t very hospitable to that kind of travel. In one incident, Athena transformed Arachne (a fantastic weaver) into a spider for her arrogance (some sources say that Arachne was just as good a weaver as Athena: therefore, the gods were extremely insecure, as they didn't want people to think that they could be fantastic at their chosen craft).
The god Apollo was the son of Jupiter and Latona (otherwise known as Leto). As expected, Jupiter caused Latona intense anguish: after impregnating her, Juno realized the identity of the woman he had an affair with. She decided to punish Leto by warning everyone (including the land) that any who would give her shelter would be severely punished by her. The stupidity and utter inhumanity of the gods are seen in the following sentences: “Latona, weary and parched with thirst, drew near a small pool by the wayside to refresh herself; but, urged by Juno, some reapers bade her pass on, and then, seeing she paid no heed to their commands, they sprang into the shallow waters, and stirred up the mud at the bottom until it was quite unpalatable. With tear-dimmed eyes, Latona prayed these cruel men might never leave the spot whereon they now stood; and Jupiter, in answer to her prayer, immediately transformed them into huge green frogs, which creatures have since then showed great preference for muddy pools” (52). The previous quote definitively shows that the Olympian gods shouldn’t be respected at all: they’re spoiled, angry children who have immeasurable power. Furthermore, Leto shouldn’t be pitied here either: if she knew that her lover was Zeus, she should’ve had second thoughts about what she would’ve done, seeing Jupiter’s and Juno’s past records when it came to love affairs. But, however, as is present in many humans who do stupid actions and engage in unhealthy behaviors, Leto lacked any foresight, allowing her animalistic impulses to reign supreme over the gift of insight and reason. She eventually gave birth to Apollo and Diana on an island that moved in the ocean (this phenomenon wasn’t explained). One of Apollo’s disciples (Apollo also specialized in medicine) was Aesculapius, who was so good at medicine he could bring back the dead. As expected, Jupiter, fearing that people would stop paying him respect due to Aesculapius’s medical skill, struck him dead with a lightning bolt (again, he’s a spoiled child who should be mocked if he does exist). Jupiter, not having enough with merely slaying Apollo’s disciple and son, banished Apollo to earth to serve as a slave to the king of Thessaly, Admetus. Apollo, who was treated well by Admetus, asked the gods to give him eternal life. They agreed, but required a substitute to be found: “This divine decree was reported to Alcestis, Admetus’ beautiful young wife, who in a passion of self-sacrifice offered herself as substitute, and cheerfully gave her life for her husband. But immortality was too dearly bought at such a price; and Admetus mourned until Hercules, pitying his grief, descended into Hades, and brought her back from the tomb” (55). Apollo eventually slew the Python, which had tormented his mother while she was pregnant along with innumerable other humans: he shot it with arrows. Since the Python was said to have arisen from darkness and slime, not to mention the fact that Apollo could be represented by the sun, “This annihilation of Python is, of course, nothing but an allegory, illustrating the sun’s power to dry up marshes and stagnant pools, thus preventing the lurking fiend malaria from making further inroads” (57). Apollo had a male lover, Hyacinthus, who was murdered by Zephyrus, god of the south wind (he also loved him, and was so envious of Apollo that he caused a projectile thrown by him to come flying back, hitting Hyacinthus in the head, killing him). Apollo also tried to make Daphne the nymph his female lover, but was met with rejection: she fled from him, and transformed into a laurel tree rather than be with him. Apollo, unrelenting, made her branches into a symbol of victory, carrying some away with him. Apollo, like all the gods, had a dark side: one day, Minerva created the flute, which greatly embarrassed her, seeing that as she played it, her cheeks puffed. Throwing it away, she said that whoever picked it up would suffer a terrible fate. Chance had it that a satyr Marsyas found it, and he became very good at it (seeing that the divine breath of Minerva was in the flute). He became so good, in fact, that he bragged that he was better at it than Apollo. Apollo, after challenging him to a contest, flayed him alive. That is, “Apollo bound Marsyas to a tree, and slew him cruelly. As soon as the mountain nymphs heard of their favorite’s sad death, they began to weep, and shed such torrents of tears, that they formed a new river, called Marsyas, in memory of the sweet musician” (64). Apollo was the father of Orpheus (the mother was the muse of music Calliope): Orpheus was a legendary musician when it came to the lyre. When he married his wife Eurydice, tragedy soon struck: while she was fleeing from her admirer Aristaeus, a serpent bit her, causing her to die. Orpheus marched into the underworld and played his music so beautifully that no one harmed him, not even Cerberus. He begged Hades and Proserpina to allow him his wife back, and they agreed, though on one condition: if he truly believes and trusts in his wife, he must not look back at her until he is above ground. Consenting, Orpheus almost completed the task: he failed it at the last possible moment, when he was just a few steps away from reaching the surface. As Guerber put it, “His longing to feast his eyes once more upon her loved features made him forget the condition imposed by Pluto, and turn just before he reached the earth; but he only beheld the vanishing form of the wife he had so nearly snatched from the grave” (69). As she disappeared, Orpheus’s heart was shattered, and he lost the will to live. He was eventually murdered by the Bacchantes (female followers of the god of wine Bacchus) when they were angry that he wasn’t a jolly, light-hearted person anymore: they tore him to shreds with their bare hands.
Another story when it comes to Apollo is his son Phaeton, who wished to ride the sun chariot after being humiliated by his peers. Despite Apollo’s warnings and entreaties, Phaeton persisted in his requests, causing Apollo to allow him the opportunity. Phaeton, as expected, was completely inexperienced, and caused much destruction: he couldn’t drive the chariot correctly, and flew so close to the Earth on one occasion that he tanned the skin of many inhabitants black. In other areas, he flew so far away that the land froze. Zeus, after seeing that his temples were smoldering and that people were cursing his name, took out his deadliest thunderbolt, and struck Phaeton dead. His smoldering corpse fell into the Eridanus River. The nine muses are the following: Clio (Muse of history), Euterpe (Muse of music), Thalia (Muse of poetry), Melpomene (Muse of tragedy), Terpsichore (Muse of dancing), Erato (Muse of lyric poetry), Polyhymnia (Muse of rhetoric), Calliope (Muse of heroic poetry), and Urania (Muse of astronomy). Guerber moves on to discuss Diana, the twin sister of Apollo and the goddess of the moon and hunting: Leto, after giving birth to her two children, boasted furiously of having two great children (conveniently forgetting all the pain she had undergone just to do so), clearly illustrating how obnoxious people can be (does she want Juno to become even angrier?). Therefore, when Niobe, the daughter of Tantalus (the man who cut his son into many pieces and served his flesh to the gods and was subsequently punished in the underworld) bragged that she had fourteen children (who’s proud of just having kids? Does she have anything better to do with her life?), Leto showed her true colors by ordering Diana and Apollo to brutally slay her fourteen children (instead of punishing her as they should’ve done if they had any common sense). Obeying, they followed the orders of their wicked mother, killing her fourteen children in front of her (making them serial killers: again, why would Leto be so petty to order for this punishment? After all, the father of her two children stopped spending time with her long ago, and viewed her only as a sexual object to be toyed with, then discarded - does she have any remarkable qualities that make her different from Niobe? While it’s true that Niobe’s boasting was extremely obnoxious, so was Leto’s: they’re both sad, pathetic people). Niobe, her heart shattered, turning her into stone that continued to weep over the deaths of her offspring. Diana was a virgin goddess, though she had a close relationship with some mortals, such as Endymion (she put him into a deep, eternal slumber so she can constantly watch him rest) and Orion (a powerful hunter who lost his eyesight but recovered that faculty by being helped by a Cyclops: he was blinded as punishment for trying to steal a woman instead of going through the usual martial proceedings). Diana accidentally killed Orion: her brother Apollo was petty, seeing how Diana gave Orion much much more attention than him. That is, he told her to shoot “at a dark speck rising and falling far out at sea” that turned out to be Orion’s head (91). After realizing her mistake, she didn't chastise her brother at all: on the contrary, she “vowed never to forget him, and placed him and his faithful dog Sirius as constellations in the sky” (as if that somehow made the situation better) (91). When it comes to her vengeance, in one incident she punished Actaeon (a hunter, who had numerous dogs) by transforming him into a stag for accidentally seeing her nude. His dogs, finding him, didn't know that he was their master and tore him to shreds.
Guerber proceeds to discuss Venus, the goddess of love. She originated from the sea, as Cronus’s blood transformed into a deity. Despite being beautiful, she was cunning, unfaithful, and shallow (potentially a critique of those who pride their appearances above all else): she was married to Vulcan, a genius Olympian who was fantastic at engineering (who was also hideous, causing Venus to feel that she was too good for him, forgetting that she had only her appearance, while Vulcan had technical skill, knowledge, and years of experience). As expected, she had an affair with the god Mars (the god of war, who is extremely cowardly and petty, yet ruthless and murderous). Whenever they would have an affair, Mars would have his servant Alectryon stand watch at the door: however, one morning he fell asleep while on the job, causing Apollo to see the two lovers from his sun chariot. Apollo quickly went to Vulcan and told him of his wife’s affair. Vulcan, infuriated, grabbed a flexible yet unbreakable net (made of linked steel) and leapt into the room the two lovers were in before throwing it on them. Mars and Venus were thus captured, and Vulcan exacted his vengeance by showing them to all the gods, ruining their reputations (which they deserved for their lust and arrogance). When he set them free, Mars grabbed Alectryon, turning him into a rooster as punishment for his negligence. Venus had an affair with a hunter named Adonis who was gored to death one day by a wild boar. As expected, those who admired her the most were young people (who were influenced largely by hormones, emotions, and hopes, not calculated reason): in one instance, two admirers of Venus, Hero and Leander, died together. To specify, Leander made it a habit to swim to Hero’s home every evening across the ocean to be with her. One night, he perished in a particularly large storm, causing Hero to commit suicide in a fit of despair by jumping into the tumultuous waves. In another tragic incident, two lovers, Pyramus and Thisbe, also died together: they were deeply in love (only on a surface level: like most stories, they only liked each other’s appearances) and wanted to meet (to do the obvious). However, their parents wouldn’t like that, as their families were feuding. Disobeying, they decided to meet in the forest. Thisbe got there early, and saw a lion whose teeth were smeared with blood. Terrified, she dropped her veil as she fled. Later, when Pyramus happened across the scene, he saw the damaged veil (the lion had chewed on it quite a bit) and the paw-prints of the lion. Believing that Thisbe had been killed by the lion, he stabbed himself to death with a dagger. A few minutes later, Thisbe reappeared and found the body of Pyramus. Heartbroken, she used the same dagger to end her life. To honor them, “the fruit of the mulberry tree, which had been white, assumed a blood-like hue, dyed by the blood which flowed from the death wounds of Pyramus and Thisbe” (110). In another incident, there was Echo and Narcissus: Echo was a talkative nymph who fell in love with Narcissus (as his name suggested, he was very narcissistic and had no special qualities save his pleasing appearance). Narcissus, as expected, rejected her, causing her to beg Venus to make him feel the same misery as her: “she implored Venus to punish him by making him suffer the pangs of unrequited love; then, melancholy and longing to die, she wandered off into the mountains … there, brooding continually over her sorrow, pined away until there remained naught of her but her melodious voice” (110). Venus punished Narcissus one day as he was getting a drink from a pool by making him think that his reflection was another person: it didn't take long for Narcissus to realize that he couldn’t get to the person in the reflection. However, he remained there until he died, never realizing that he was looking only at himself. The gods of Olympus changed his corpse into a flower which is frequently found near quiet bodies of water.
In another instance, there was a sculptor named Pygmalion who was famous for his skill. One day, he created a statue that was so beautiful that he fell in love with it, so much so that he begged Venus to make it a living person. “As Pygmalion had always been an obdurate bachelor, and had frequently declared he would never marry, Venus was delighted to see him at last a victim of the tender passion, and resolved to grant his request” (113). That is, the statue came to life and Pygmalion quickly became engaged with her and they got married (and lived happily ever after? This is one of the few truly happy endings in Greek mythology). For all Venus did for lovers, she could be quite unsympathetic: when Cupid, her son (in some stories like this), was injured accidentally by Psyche, a beautiful young maiden, she refused her to see him until she proved herself by doing virtually impossible tasks. However, Psyche completed all of them save the last: nonetheless, she was made into a goddess for her devotion and perseverance, and lived happily with Cupid. Guerber proceeds to discuss Mercury: Mercury, as expected, was a son of Zeus (basically the 10,000th child he had with other women, to the rage of his rightful wife). Not long after being born, Mercury quickly demonstrated that he was very crafty by stealing some of the cattle of Apollo. In the end, he was able to save himself from being sent to Tartarus by offering Apollo his lyre, an instrument that he invented himself. Mercury is frequently portrayed with a magic wand (a Caduceus, which has two snakes intertwined around it), flying shoes (to be specific, they have wings), and a cap. Mercury, aside from being the messenger of the gods, was also in charge of “eloquence, commerce, rain, wind, and the special patron of travelers, shepherds, cheats, and thieves” (126). To demonstrate, in one instance he helped Zeus sleep with a nymph named Io (seriously, how is Zeus the king of the Olympians? I believe his role in mythology can be seen as a representation of how bad rulers frequently seize power for long periods of time) who had been turned into a cow by Hera and was guarded by a giant named Argus who had eyes on every part of his body by approaching him in a friendly way. Once he was close to him, he told such boring stories while making use of poppies that he caused Argus to fall asleep. After doing so, he callously decapitated Argus (to reiterate, he committed cold-blooded murder just because his father wanted to hump yet another woman). Juno, however, wasn’t done yet: she sent a gadfly to cause Io the cow much pain, as it wouldn’t stop following and stinging her. Once Io reached Egypt, she was transformed back into a girl by Jupiter, and even allowed Zeus to copulate with her (after he put her through unimaginable suffering): “Jupiter restored her to all her girlish loveliness, and where her son Epaphus was born, to be the first king and the founder of Memphis” (128). Guerber discusses Mars: just know that he has attendants for his war chariot, is a coward (he fled from many battles despite being the god of war), and was the father of Romulus and Remus (he seduced a temple priestess who was sworn to chastity - in other versions, he raped her).
Guerber describes Vulcan, the god of the forge. Vulcan was born hideous, causing him to be avoided by all the other gods. In one instance, he tried to save his mother (who never liked him only because of his ugliness) from being dangled over the void by Jupiter (she was conspiring against him, and was also unhappy that he was a prolific womanizer), only to be tossed off of Olympus by Jupiter, which permanently crippled him (his legs were severely mangled). Furthermore, Juno made no attempt to communicate with him once he reached the mortal realm, causing him to become bitter towards her. He established a forge in Mountain Aetna, where he partnered with the Cyclopes to produce various miraculous creations, including two handmaidens made of gold (they were statues) that helped him walk, seeing his crippled legs. He also worked on a special throne in his free time: the throne would appear normal when no one was sitting on it, but the moment someone rests on it, they’ll be unable to rise again. He gave the chair to his mother, who fell for it. The gods begged him to release her, but he didn't, citing her indifference towards him as a justification. Eventually, Bacchus succeeded in doing so by using wine as an incentive. For the most part, Vulcan lived in Mount Aetna, as he didn't like Olympus, as he knew the other Olympians loathed him for his appearance. Regardless, he still built them palaces (why?) and created Cupid’s arrows and Zeus’s thunderbolts. Guerber moves on to talk about Neptune, ruler of the oceans. He possessed tremendous power, as he could control the behavior of the seas. He also disliked the Trojans greatly, as a Trojan king, Laomedon, made a habit of not keeping his promises: when he was exiled from Olympus for plotting to overthrow Zeus, he built the walls of Troy for Laomedon. Laomedon promised him a reward once he was done, but failed to deliver it. Enraged, Neptune summoned a monster from the deep to terrorize Troy. As expected, Laomedon decided to save his own skin by offering his daughter Hesione as a sacrifice. Fortunately for her, Hercules happened upon Troy from one of his labors: upon hearing of the problem, he slew the monster with his club. As expected, Laomedon refused to compensate him. Hercules soon gave him his just reward: “aided by a chosen band of adventurers … The city was stormed and taken, the king slain, and his wife and children carried to Greece as captives … Laomedon’s failure to pay his just debts was the primary cause of the enmity which Apollo and Neptune displayed towards the Trojans during their famous war with the Greeks” (146). Neptune’s official wife was Amphitrite, a Nereid (one of the fifty daughters of the deities Doris and Nereus). One of Neptune’s attendants, Proteus, could tell the future. Therefore, he was frequently badgered by those who wished to know the future, causing him to react by changing “his form with bewildering rapidity, and, unless they clung to him through all his changes, they could obtain no answer to their questions” (151). To complete the trinity, there is Pluto, the god of the underworld. There are five rivers of the underworld (the underworld is frequently referred to as “Hades” to pay homage to its ruler): the Cocytus (River of Tears), the Acheron (River of Pain), the Phlegethon (River of Fire), the Lethe (river which makes you forget things), and the Styx (toxic river that separates the underworld from the world above). Charon is the only boatman, and he requires the standard payment of an obolus (a single coin) from the spirits in return for passage. Those who have no money have to wait for a century until Charon is finally willing to provide the service for free (to dissuade those who are stingy). There are three judges that decide the fates of the souls: they are Minos, Rhadamanthus, and Aeacus. They know everything about the individual due to their station, and will therefore decide their fates fairly: if the person lived a virtuous life, they’ll be allowed into Elysium. If they were immoral, they’ll be sentenced to an eternity of pain and suffering in Tartarus. If their lives were ordinary, they would be sent to the Fields of Asphodel to wander unceasingly for eternity.
There are three furies within the underworld: their names are Alecto, Tisiphone, and Megaera. They focused on punishing those who had committed especially egregious crimes while they were still alive (one of the crimes they loathed most was the murder of a parent), and they also kept watch over the damned souls of Tartarus. The three Fates (Morae) are Clotho (who appears as the youngest and spins the thread - the thread represents the life of a person), Lechesis (the one who twists the thread, thereby allowing the person’s life to play its course), and Atropos (the one who cuts the thread, marking the demise of the individual). Some of the prisoners of Hades include the Danaides, forty-nine (a total of fifty in the world above in the past) sisters who had callously murdered their husbands (only one of them refused to go through with the dead): they’re punished by being forced to repeatedly fill a bottomless cask (it has no bottom). Whenever they stop, they'll be ruthlessly whipped by an attendant spirit. Tantalus was a king who insulted the gods by killing and feeding his son Pelops to them: the gods resurrected Pelops and severely punished Tantalus. That is, “he stood up to his chin in a stream of pure water, tormented with thirst; for, whenever he stooped to drink, the waters fled from his parched lips. Over his head hung a branch of luscious fruit. His hunger was as intolerable as his thirst, but, whenever he clutched at the fruit, the branch swung upward, and eluded his eager grasp … This singular punishment inflicted upon Tantalus gave rise to the expression ‘to tantalize.’” (161-2). Another one of the punished was Sisyphus, a king who tried to evade death by holding Thanatos (the god of death) captive for numerous days. When he was going to be punished, he deceived Hades himself: before being sent to the underworld, he told his wife to leave his nude body on the city streets. Therefore, when he reached the underworld, he told Hades (some sources say Persephone) that his body was dishonored, and requested permission to go to the world above to scold her. He (or she) granted his request: however, instead of keeping his promise, he reentered his body and lived out the rest of his life. When he died, he was punished even more harshly: he was forced to do a Sisyphean (that is, a pointless and impossible task that generally repeats itself) for the rest of eternity. Guerber describes, “he was condemned to roll a huge stone to the top of a very steep hill; and just as he reached the summit, and fancied his task done, the rock would slip from his grasp and roll to the foot of the hill, thus obliging him to renew all his exertions” (162). This punishment can be seen as symbolic: trying to escape from death itself is futile, just like pushing an enchanted boulder up a hill. Furthermore, Sisyphus was guilty of other misdemeanors as well: while he commercially benefited his city of Corinth (he was the king), he murdered travelers and guests to steal their valuables, therefore violating one of the key rules of Roman society, that of causing no harm to guests. Then there’s Salmoneus, a king who pretended to be Jupiter to glorify himself: Jupiter quickly came across his behavior, and struck him down with a lightning bolt. “In Tartarus, Salmoneus was placed beneath an overhanging rock, which momentarily threatened to fall, and crush him under its mass” (163). He also obliterated the city Salmoneus had founded, murdering in cold blood most of the inhabitants. Titus was a giant who insulted Juno, and was punished in the same way (for the most part) as Prometheus: he was given a regenerating liver that was continuously attacked by a bird (in this case, a vulture). Ixion was a king (of the Lapithae) who murdered his father-in-law. Once he was summoned to Olympus (that was the first act of violence committed, thereby making him infamous), he “pleaded so skillfully, that Jupiter was about to declare him acquitted, when he suddenly caught him making love to Juno, which offense seemed so unpardonable, that he sent him to Tartarus, where he was bound to a constantly revolving wheel of fire” (164). As noted above, a dashing double standard exists: while Jupiter has cheated on his wife countless times, he becomes enraged when his wife copulates with someone else. To say the least, he’s a hypocritical fiend. Unfortunately, this kind of double standard was prevalent for much of human history: when Augustus became the emperor of Rome, he stated that husbands can kill their wives if they find them cheating, yet they have every right to openly sleep with other women, including prostitutes.
Bacchus is next discussed: like many others, he was the illegitimate son of Zeus. Zeus’s affair with his mother (Semele) caused her death and almost ended the life of Bacchus: when Hera found out that she was cheating on him for the umpteenth time, she turned into the form of Semele’s old nurse, and goaded Semele (who, like many characters in Greek mythology, was exceedingly arrogant and foolish - it was mentioned in the text that she was proud only of her appearance, and nothing more) into asking for Zeus to appear in his divine form. Zeus, being a weak-willed individual despite all his power, complied with Semele’s requests: however, she couldn’t handle his divine form, and promptly burned to death. However, her unborn child survived (this is eerily akin to evolution: individuals that are immoral, foolish, and violent are those that leave the most offspring, thereby ensuring the world is deeply flawed due to its inhabitants). Zeus gave Bacchus to his aunt Ino, who was married to Athamas, the king of Thebes. Juno, not giving up on the idea of vengeance, ordered Tisiphone the Fury to drive Athamas insane and to punish him and his associates for harboring the child of Zeus: “In a fit of deluded frenzy, he pursued his wife and children as if they were wild beasts. One of his sons, Learchus, fell beneath his arrows; and, to escape his murderous fury, Ino plunged headlong into the sea with her second child in her arms. The gods, in pity for her sufferings, changed her into the goddess Leucothea, and her son into a sea deity by the name of Palaemon” (170). When Athamas finally came to, he escaped, terrified of being prosecuted for the atrocities he had committed while insane. Bacchus survived, for Jupiter turned him into an animal to protect him (though, to clarify, humans are animals as well: I just use the word “animal” out of convenience). One time, when Bacchus was kidnapped by pirates, he caused grape vines (that could create wine) to emerge from the sea, tangling the ship. His followers came to rescue him, and his kidnappers, incapable of processing the scene, lost their minds, jumping overboard, becoming dolphins. Bacchus was also the one who gave Midas the golden touch (Midas found Bacchus’s tutor who was drunk and wandered away from his friends, and returned him to Dionysus, thereby earning his gratitude) and was the one responsible for taking it away (he told Minos to wash his hands in the Pactolus River). Bacchus loved going to Naxos (an island) to relax. One time, he met Ariadne, who had been abandoned by Theseus (she had saved his life from the Minotaur prior, and he left her on the island while she was sleeping as the ship was passing). Bacchus and Ariadne got along well, and eventually married: though she died, Jupiter revived her and made her a deity. Bacchus had a dangerous side, though: when he was insulted by the king of Thebes, Pentheus (Pentheus ordered for Bacchus and his followers to not go into his cities to do their festivities), he caused Pentheus to be torn to shreds by his own mother when he tried to spy on what they were doing. That is, Pentheus “disguised himself, and hid in a bush near the consecrated place, hoping to see all without being seen; but an inadvertent movement attracted the attention of the already excited Bacchantes, who, led by Agave, the king’s own mother, dragged him from his hiding place and tore him limb from limb” (178). Bacchus, aside from being the patron of wine, also dominated the field of insanity.
Guerber proceeds to discuss Ceres, the goddess of agriculture and the harvest. She had a daughter, Proserpina (another daughter of Zeus), who was kidnapped by Pluto (he had low self-esteem when it came to romance, as he was continuously rejected by goddesses due to his being lord of the underworld, which had little natural light and nature). When Ceres learned that Pluto had done the kidnapping, she ordered for her daughter to be returned to her. Pluto agreed, but by that point in time Prosperina had eaten a small part of a pomegranate: by eating the food of a host, the guest is interpreted to have consented to their stay. Therefore, Proserpina has been linked to the underworld. Fortunately, an agreement was reached: she would stay in the underworld for half a year, and would be allowed on the surface for the other half (she was sentenced to a month in the underworld each year for every pomegranate seed she had eaten). While she’s aboveground, Ceres, appeased, would allow the harvest to continue. However, when she’s in the underworld, Ceres, unhappy, would refuse to perform her duties, thereby elegantly explaining the four seasons. Ceres in one instance punished a man named Erisichthon extremely punitively: Erisichthon went to one of her sacred groves and “cut down one of her sacred oaks. At his first blow, blood began to flow from the tree; but, unfettered by the phenomenon of the entreaties of the bystanders, Erisichthon continued. Finally, annoyed by the importunities of the spectators, he turned and slew one or two, and then completed his sacrilege. Ceres, incensed by his insolence and cruelty, devised a terrible chastisement for the unfortunate man, and sent Famine to gnaw his vitals, and torment him night and day. The wretch, tortured by a hunger which no amount of food could ally, disposed of all his property to obtain the means of procuring nourishment; but his monstrous appetite continued, and, as he had but one daughter left, he sold her as a slave to obtain food” (192). When he sold his daughter as a slave, Neptune intervened on her behalf by setting her free: tormented terribly by hunger and with no means of obtaining food, Erisichthon consumed himself. Another goddess to mention is Vesta (or Hestia), the manager of the hearth who was honored by Rome with the Vestal Virgins, a tradition that was begun with the Roman king Numa Pompilius. The Vestal Virgins would begin their service when they’re only six, and would keep the sacred fire (that honored Vesta) alight at all times, for it was warned that if the flame is to go out, Rome will be plunged into catastrophe. The Vestals, as their name suggested, were supposed to remain virgins during their service: if they don’t, they’ll be buried alive. However, “The Vestals were … so pure and vigilant, that during one thousand years only eighteen failed to keep their vows satisfactorily, and suffered punishment … In return for the signal services the Vestals rendered to the state by maintaining this sacred fire, they enjoyed many privileges: among others, that of being preceded by a lictor with fasces when they walked abroad; of occupying the seats of honor in public ceremonies and festivities; of being buried within the city limits (a privilege granted to but very few); and of obtaining the pardon of criminals whom they met by accident on their way to the place of execution” (197). The Vestals continued to function until the emperor Theodosius tried to destroy religions that rivaled Christianity: in 380 AD, he “abolished the worship of Vesta, dispersed the Vestals, and extinguished the sacred fire” (199). A god that is worth mentioning is Janus, who is the patron of decision-making (seen in his two faces). Somnus (Hypnos) and Mors (Thanatos) lived in the underworld: Somnus was responsible for sleep while Mors was the god of death. Aeolus was the god of the storm and winds.
Guerber proceeds to discuss heroes. She discusses in detail Hercules, Perseus, Theseus, Jason, Atlanta, Oedipus, Bellerophon, Ulysses, and Aeneas. She also discusses minor divinities and provides much-appreciated analysis of the myths. Hercules was a hero who was fathered by Jupiter (surprise! But seriously, Jupiter is a terrible individual) and was almost killed by Juno as an infant, seeing how she sent poisonous snakes to kill him. However, he had superhuman strength, and was thereby able to defend himself. After winning battles for his homeland, he flew into a fit of rage (he became insane, which was instigated by Juno) and killed his wife and children. To atone for his deeds, he performed his fabled twelve labors, which are listed in the following: (1) Nemean Lion (a lion that is ferocious and with skin impenetrable by daggers and arrows: Hercules kills it by strangling it with his brute strength), (2) the Hydra of Lerna (it has numerous heads, but only one is immortal: only when that head is destroyed is the Hydra dead. However, every other head, when severed, not only grows back but sprouts a second. Hercules enlisted the help of his nephew, who would torch the stump of the Hydra after its head is decapitated to prevent it from regenerating - this deed was judged as invalid by the king ordering the tasks, as Hercules received help), (3) the Stag of Cerynea (was extremely quick and was treasured by Diana and Apollo: when Hercules caught it, he promised he was only doing it for a task, and would return it once his deed was done. He kept his word, and they left him alone instead of striking him dead, which was what the king hoped to happen), (4) the Augean Stables (some treasured cows lived in conditions so filthy that the task of cleaning the stables was deemed to be virtually impossible: Hercules solved the problem by using a river to clean their living space - this was also judged to not count by the king, as the river technically helped Hercules do the task), (5) to capture the Erymanthian Boar (that possessed much physical strength: Hercules completed the task by using sticky snow), (6) the Cretan Bull (the bull which was the father of the Minotaur - the sorceress Pasiphae was forced to fall in love with it by the conspiring of Venus and Neptune, seen in how Neptune raised the bull from the ocean at the request of Minos, expecting for it to be sacrificed in his honor, only to be betrayed by Minos, who wanted to keep it for breeding - some foreshadowing, huh? The task proved to be remarkably easy, as Minos no longer wanted the bull around, for it was a reminder of the Minotaur), (7) Diomedes’s steeds (Diomedes was a vicious and sadistic ruler who fed his horses human flesh - Hercules was able to harness them by feeding him and his guards to his own horses, who didn't discriminate when it came to what they were being fed, so long as they were being given the food they had grown to crave), (8) Hippolyte’s girdle (the king’s spoiled brat of a teenage daughter wanted it. While Hercules was initially able to get along with the queen of the Amazons, Hippolyte, Juno caused the Amazons to believe that their queen was being seduced and lied to, thereby causing an armed conflict. Hercules was still able to get the girdle and complete his task), (9) the Stymphalian Birds (these birds were extremely dangerous, as they were quite sadistic, seen in how they enjoyed terrorizing the people near the Stymphalian swamp by throwing poisonous feathers that were as sharp as darts at them. Hercules was able to shoot some of them with arrows, and used a cowbell to produce a noise so terrible that they moved quickly to some other area), (10) the Cattle of Geryones (Hercules was supposed to get the cattle from Geryones, a person that watched over his livestock with great jealousy and scrutiny. Geryones, upon learning that Hercules wanted his cattle, attacked. Hercules killed him with ease), (11) the Hesperian Apples (which was guarded by an almighty dragon: Hercules got them by asking Atlas, who was forced to carry the world on his shoulders and also had control over the dragon, to do the task. He outwitted Atlas: Atlas didn't plan to return himself under the burden of the sky, but Hercules appealed to his sense of vanity and pity, thereby trapping him under his burden once more), and (12) getting Cerberus from the underworld (he did so using his strength, and returned Cerberus once his task was done). After Hercules gained his freedom, he committed murder once again (in a fit of rage, he pushed a person who suspected him of thievery off a great height): to atone for this crime, he became the slave of Omphale, the Queen of Lydia. He eventually married a woman named Deianeira after rescuing her from a river spirit, and a centaur named Nessus soon tried to kidnap her, but was slain by Hercules (he was shot through the heart by an arrow). He lied to Deianeira by claiming that centaur blood acted as a love potion, and warned her that Hercules would soon abandon her for someone else. Deianeira took some of his blood. Soon enough, Hercules planned to marry a girl he had taken captive named Iole. Deianeira put the centaur’s blood on his shirt, not knowing that centaur’s blood actually acted like acid: when Hercules put it on, he suffered intense agony before climbing onto his funeral pyre and going up in flames. Upon realizing what she had done, Deianeira killed herself, and Hercules was made the gatekeeper of Olympus by Jupiter, ending the tale of arguably the most legendary hero of Greek mythology.
The next hero to be discussed is Perseus, yet another son of Jupiter (his mother, Danae, was locked in a tower by her father Acrisius, the ruler of Argos, as it was prophesied that his grandson will kill him). When the child was born (and Jupiter, as usual, was completely absent), Acrisius ordered for him and his mother to be executed by being locked into a box and thrown into the ocean. They survived, however, and reached another place. There Danae was wooed by the king of the island, Phineus, who sent Perseus away to another part of the island to make wooing his mother easier. Despite all of Phineus’s attempts at courtship, Danae refused to concede herself to him (because he wasn’t an immortal god like Zeus). In an attempt to get rid of Perseus for good, Phineus agreed he would stop pestering his mother if he killed the monster Medusa. Medusa was once a beautiful human who was raped by Neptune in Minerva’s temple: regardless, Minerva punished her by turning her into a hideous monster (some argue that this was a benefit, as no one would ever rape her again) that had the power to turn people to stone if they were to look at her directly, seeing that she couldn’t severely punish Neptune (which reflects reality: those with power and influence can get away with egregious indecencies and crimes while their victims are shunned, mocked, assaulted, and blamed for their misfortunes). Medusa’s two sisters accompanied her to an isolated cave to live, only to be disturbed by Perseus, who, with the help of the gods, decapitated her, seeing that he needed to bring her head back as proof that he had slew her. When Medusa’s blood fell onto the earth, snakes were created. Also, the stump of Medusa’s head produced Chrysaor (a powerful warrior) and the winged steed Pegasus (she had become pregnant by Neptune’s rape, and her children were in her body, fully developed, the entire time). On the way back to the island, he found Atlas, who was still holding up his burden. Taking pity on Atlas's pain, he showed him Medusa’s face, turning him into stone and nullifying the discomfort he has felt for millennia. He also saves a princess named Andromeda from being eaten by a sea monster by using Medusa’s head to turn said monster into stone. He returns to the island to find Phineus trying to force Danae to marry him, and deals with him like how he dealt with many of the previous problems in his life, by taking out Medusa’s head and turning him and his allies (including his soldiers) into stone. After rescuing his mother, they went back to Argos: Acrisius, hearing of their arrival, escaped. He pretended to be a beggar, and was accidentally slain by Perseus when he threw a discus: a gust of wind caused it to collide with Acrisius, killing him. Perseus ruled as the king of Argos for the rest of his life.
Theseus was a Greek hero who was rumored to have been the son of Neptune (his mother, however, probably wasn’t raped by him, unlike Medusa). Theseus’s potential human father had left him and his mother for another kingdom for some undisclosed reason, and he told his wife that when Theseus becomes mature, he should push over a certain boulder to get to a sword that will protect him when he tries to find his father. Indeed, when Theseus grew older, he got the sword and went on the journey to find his father (who was then the ruler of Athens). On the way, he killed numerous serial killers that have threatened previous travelers, including Sinis (a giant who used his large club to murder people for entertainment - Theseus beat him in combat), Sciron (a robber who guarded a cliff, and forced travelers to wash his feet: he would then kick them off the mountain into the water, where a giant tortoise lived that loved to eat human flesh - Theseus intimidated him with the club he got from Sinis, forcing him to wash his feet, only to treat him the same way he treated his numerous victims: he kicked him off the cliff, where his tortoise mercilessly devoured him), Cercyon (a king who would force travelers to wrestle him: if they lose, he will kill them - Theseus beat him by maneuvring around him and taking him unawares), and Procrustes (a sadist who had two beds: one was extremely long, the other extremely short. He would force guests into the room with the two beds, and would make them choose between one bed or the other. If they choose the long bed, they’ll be stretched until they are as tall as the bed. If they choose the short bed, their body parts will be accordingly severed until they cover only the vertical distance of it. Theseus gave him a piece of his own medicine by making him try them both before ending him for good). When Theseus reached Athens, he discovered, to his dismay, that his father had married the evil sorceress Medea: Medea, seeing Theseus, didn't want Aegeus to know that Theseus was his biological son. Therefore, she convinced him that he was an enemy, and poisoned his drink. Fortunately for Theseus, his father recognized him as his son: shocked, he knocked the drink to the ground. The liquid, falling on a dog, killed it rapidly. He ordered for Medea to be seized, but she escaped to Media by entering her chariot (flown by dragons and gifted to her by the god Helios, who was her grandfather). While Theseus initially celebrated with his father, he learned of the Minotaur: Minos’s (the king of Crete) son had died while he was in Athens, causing him to become enraged and to demand a tribute to appease him. That is, he wants, occasionally, for some of the young men and women of Athens to be forced to come to Crete, where he constructed an intricate labyrinth that is virtually unnavigable. The labyrinth also houses the Minotaur, a creature that is half-man and half-bull that mercilessly tears its victims apart (probably due to it being neglected because of its hideousness, as well as the fact that it was likely for it to have been abused by its trainers). Theseus volunteered for the assignment, and went to Crete to kill the Minotaur to free the people of Athens from the tribute once and for all. Upon arriving at Crete, Ariadne, the daughter of Minos, fell in love with him. She told him that she would help him if he would marry her. Theseus agreed, and Ariadne gave him a dagger and a ball of thread so that he could find his way out of the labyrinth. Theseus succeeded in slaying the Minotaur, and took Ariadne with him. However, upon reaching an island, he grew tired of her and abandoned her, leaving her completely alone. Ariadne, as stated before, was later rescued by Bacchus. Theseus, upon arriving back at home, accidentally caused his father’s death: Aegeus asked that if he were to survive, he should change the sails to white. Theseus forgot this, so when Aegeus saw the black sails of the ship, he believed that he had perished. Heartbroken, he threw himself off a tower into the Aegean Sea, ending his life. Theseus as the king was dissolute, as his friends influenced him negatively. He eventually had the audacity to try to kidnap Persephone, the wife of Hades, with his friend Pirithous, the king of the Athenian army: both their wives died not long after they married them, and “To avoid similar bereavement in [the future], they both resolved to secure goddesses, who, being immortal, would share their thrones forever. Theseus carried off Helen, the daughter of Jupiter, and, as she was still but a child, instructed her to the care of his mother, Aethra, until she attained a suitable age for matrimony. Then, in return for Pirithous’ kind offices, he accompanied him to Hades, where they intended to carry off Proserpina” (261).
Helen’s twin brothers Castor and Pollux rescued her, and Hades quickly caught Theseus and Pirithous, and put Theseus “on an enchanted rock, from which he could not descend unassisted, and bound the second to the constantly revolving wheel of his father, Ixion” (261). When Hercules performed his twelfth task, he helped Theseus off the rock. Upon returning home, he wanted to marry once more, and had the audacity to ask Ariadne’s younger sister Phaedra to marry him. Crete consented to the union. However, “she was not at all delighted with her aged husband, and, instead of falling in love with him, bestowed all her affections upon his son, Hippolytus, a virtuous youth, who utterly refused to listen to her proposals to elope. In her anger at finding her advances scorned, Phaedra went to Theseus and accused Hippolytus of attempting to kidnap her. Theseus … implored Neptune to punish the youth … a great wave suddenly arose, dashed over the chariot, and drowned the young charioteer, whose lifeless corpse was finally flung ashore at Phaedra’s feet. When the unfortunate queen saw the result of her false accusations, she confessed her crime, and, in her remorse and despair, hung herself” (263). Theseus eventually incurred the hate of his people, as he became quite cruel. Tired of him, they sent him to Scyros (an island), where the local king, Lycomedes, threw him to his death from the top of a tower. The next hero discussed is Jason, whose parents were dethroned. Wanting to restore the position of his family and himself, he challenged the usurper, his uncle Pelias. Pelias told him that he would give him the throne if he brings back the Golden Fleece, a priceless treasure guarded in Colchis, a faraway kingdom. Jason agreed, and constructed the Argo (a ship) with the help of a man named Argus. The Argo was built out of a certain tree that gave it intelligence: it would frequently talk and give advice to the crewmates (who were known as Argonauts). The Argonauts, after going through much trouble, finally reached Colchis. When Jason requested the Golden Fleece, he was denied by the king. However, he was given the chance to win it if he could harness bulls that could breathe fire (they were gifted to the king by the gods) and sow the dragon teeth into the ground (which would spawn giants: remember Cadmus and Thebes). Jason accepted the challenge (seeing how there was no other option). Fortunately for him (in the short run, at least), the king’s daughter, Medea, was a sorceress who had great knowledge and power: she said that she would help him complete the tasks if he would marry her (sound familiar?). He agrees, and she gives him a potion that will make him invulnerable to the flames of the bulls and tells him to throw a rock into the midst of the giants to survive. Following her advice, Jason completed the tasks and won the Golden Fleece. However, the king didn't plan to honor the bargain, planning to murder him and his crew before they would leave. Medea, knowing her father’s personality, told Jason and the crew that they had to leave, which they did. While escaping, they were pursued by the ships of the king. Medea, in order to make way for their escape, slew her own brother when he boarded the ship to negotiate their surrender (she’s extremely ruthless and quite cruel) and dismembered his body before throwing the pieces into the ocean (the ships chasing them would have to prioritize on recollecting the body, as funerals in Greece required the whole corpse to be considered successful). After successfully escaping, they came across a mechanical giant named Talos that threatened to crush them (it was created by Vulcan). Medea saves them by opening a valve at its foot, causing the chemicals running it to leak out: it “bled” to death. Pelias refuses to honor his agreement, causing Medea to murder him through trickery (she convinced his daughters to cut him into small pieces and to throw him into a fountain which she claimed would restore his youth), causing her and Jason to escape to avoid the wrath of Pelias’s relatives. Going to another kingdom, Jason decided to marry the daughter of the king. Medea, utterly enraged and bewildered, murdered the king and his daughter by sending her a poisoned dress that caused them both to die excruciatingly. She then murders her two children to cause Jason further suffering, and escapes after warning him that the Argo will cause his death, leaving him a broken man. Jason spends the rest of his life without aim, and dies while he’s sleeping under the Argo for the sake of nostalgia: a wooden beam fell off and struck his head, killing him and fulfilling Medea’s prophecy. The next hero discussed is Oedipus: it was prophesied that he would kill his father and marry his mother (both of them presided over Thebes), which caused him to be abandoned by them in hopes that he would die and the prophecy would be subverted. However, he was found by the king and queen of Corinth. When Oedipus was informed of the prophecy (he was a young man by then), he was horrified (he also didn't know that he was adopted, as his adoptive parents never told him). Unwilling to cause his “parents” suffering, he left the area to prevent the prophecy from coming true. While he was leaving, he came across his father (who was traveling incognito), who insulted him, causing him to brutally murder him and his attendants in a fit of rage.
Moving his way past the crime scene, he decides to help the people of Thebes by getting rid of the Sphinx which has been tormenting them: those who wish to enter the city have to answer its riddle, and if they fail, they are mercilessly devoured. Oedipus hears the riddle and gives the correct answer, causing the Sphinx to commit suicide by throwing herself off a cliff (the book says that Oedipus kills it with his sword). By saving the people of Thebes, he was made the king, and married the queen (his mother, who was widowed by his murdering his father/her husband). They had four kids (two sons and two daughters), and he suspected nothing: conversely, he was quite relieved, as he believed he had escaped his dreadful fate. However, soon a terrible disease ravaged Thebes, and Oedipus learned from the oracle that the ones who had murdered the former king had to be found and punished for the epidemic to leave. After some research, it was concluded that he was the murderer and had in fact married his mother. Horrified, his mother killed herself. Oedipus, shocked and remorseful, blinded himself with her scissors and left the city in order for the plague to stop. Oedipus was scorned by all for mistakes he had unwittingly committed, and eventually died in solitude as a wretched man. His four children ended up killing each other in a power struggle, ending his cursed lineage. Another hero that is discussed is Bellerophon, who accidentally slew his own brother while he was hunting as a youth. Heartbroken, he was sent to live with Proetus, another king (and relative), to repent of his crimes. However, “He had not sojourned there very long, before Anteia, the queen, fell in love with him; and although her husband, Proetus, treated her with the utmost kindness, she made up her mind to desert him, and tried to induce Bellerophon to elope with her. Too honest to betray a man who had treated him as a friend, the young prince refused to listen to the queen’s proposals. His refusal was to cost him dear, however; for, when Anteia saw that the youth would never yield to her wishes, she became very angry indeed, sought her husband, and accused the young stranger of crimes he had never even dreamed of committing” (295). Proetus, incensed, but unwilling to kill his guest (it went against basic decency and Roman tradition), sent Bellerophon to King Iobates, ruler of Lycia, with instructions that asked him to put Proetus to death the moment he arrived. When Iobates saw Bellerophon, they got along well: Bellerophon had forgotten to give the letter to him for a few days, and didn't know of Anteia’s treachery. When he finally gave him the letter, Iobates was hesitant to slay him: therefore, he sent him to kill the Chimaera, a ferocious beast with the head of a lion, the tale of a snake, and the body of a goat, in hopes that he would be killed by it. Bellerophon got help from Minerva (she helped him tame the Pegasus, which was Medusa’s child, by giving him an enchanted bridle). He slew the Chimaera with the aid of Pegasus, and later defeated the Amazons. Iobates, astounded, believed that Bellerophon was being protected by the gods (and indeed he was), causing him to stop trying to murder him. He also let him marry his daughter Philonoe (the younger sister of Anteia). As for Anteia, she killed herself out of anger that Bellerophon was not only alive, but happy and healthy. While he lived happily with Philonoe for some years, Bellerophon soon became quite overconfident, and wished to use Pegasus to fly to Olympus. While he tried to do so, Jupiter, seeing him, summoned a gadfly that viciously stung Pegasus, blinding him with pain, leading to him accidentally throwing Bellerophon to his death. While there are more myths in this book that are worthy of mention, these are the ones I’ll be doing: if you want to read the rest, feel free to buy the book. Here are the legends I didn't discuss: Atlanta, minor gods and goddesses, the Trojan War, Ulysses, Aeneas, and the analysis of the myths presented.
Personal thoughts:
Classical Mythology by H. A. Guerber is a fantastic book that never ceases to teach the audience of Greek mythology and the influences behind them. Entertaining and powerful, Classical Mythology discusses a wide range of gods, goddesses, heroes, and geographical (though fictional to a large part) locations. One of the biggest aspects of Greek mythology is how openly contemptible, immature, cowardly, and cruel the gods, goddesses, and deities could be: Jupiter was a prolific womanizer who fathered many children and caused many women to be tormented by Juno, Neptune had committed rape (like many other deities), and even some of the more likable gods like Mercury and Apollo have committed brutal and heinous murders, clearly showing that they’re not to be admired at all. When it comes to why the deities are like this, the answer is quite simple: people generally project their own strengths and weaknesses on the religions that they practice, which extends to the “divine” entities. After all, why would people believe in a religion that shows a god (or gods) in a way that is utterly alien to humans? Humans desire sympathy, companionship, and understanding: belief systems that don’t fall under these categories are largely ignored. Therefore, to reiterate, the gods and goddesses of Greek mythology are perverted and dangerous because those who invented them had their own issues, leading to them projecting their minds into the psyches of supposedly higher beings. I highly recommend Classical Mythology to anyone interested in legends, Greece, interesting characters, and easygoing story-telling.
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